Nervous

I'm naturally a nervous person. If you ask me to speak in public I break out in a sweat, my eyes wander, I tug at my mustache, and I rock back and forth on my feet. This also happens when I'm the new guy, or I'm confronted and not prepared to fight back, or anytime I'm in the club and not slightly tipsy. It’s really sad. My friends all laugh at me because of it. Even when I’m being nervous, I still think I'm actually quite cool, or cooler than the other people I'm around. Maybe I'm not, but I always know when I'm acting really nervous because I get really judgmental, even more than normal.

I notice myself being really nervous at my new job. I'm always on edge. The people that I work with just bother my soul. I can't relax and stop the tugging at my mustache and sweating and eye wandering because I don't trust these people. They are all drug addicts or whores to some degree. I just don't get it. I know I'm far but perfect but any time I can stand in a room and be the most pious person in it...CALL THE POLICE! If you follow me on twitter you know first hand some of the bullshit I hear on a regular basis.

The moral of this story is...I need a new job and I need to learn how to fucking relax in public with out a little liquor stinging my throat.