Working Ms. Piggy

Have you ever had someone not like you because you refuesd to tell them your inner most secrets?

Have not liked someone because every question they asked was like they wanted to know about every aspect of you life just so they could turn it into water cooler gossip?

It aggravates me that I have to sit at the job (that I once loved) and be this cold shell of myself. It’s the only way I know to keep my cool. Maybe, its not the best thing in the world. It keeps me from losing my temper, but maybe that’s what I need to do.

I might just need a new job. To separates myself from this whirlpool of fake smiles and half hearted hello’s. This is not me. This is not who I want to become at all! In all the jobs I’ve had I always tried to stay away from office politics. They always rubbed me the wrong way. There is something stomach churning about a bunch of adults giggling and gossiping. I thought it was something that people out grow. I’m trying to out grow it. Some days I succeed and others I don’t, at least I’m making an effort.

Is that something people out grow?

It can’t be hereditary…can it? (Now analyze parents bad habits)… I’m good. Then again I didn’t know my parents in their pre-me prime. I think I just made up a word “pre-me”. I like it, its cool.

That’s not even the real reason that I’m mad or writing this.

I’m really upset because I got played. Played real hard and it was so unnecessary. Its like wait. How are you giving me attitude when I’m not in the wrong, but it catches you so off guard that you sit and listen and almost believe that you are wrong. Then 3 seconds after you realize that you had an amazing come back. (I always come up with amazing comebacks after the fact.) Its my gift and my curse. It will help some friend in an argument later, it always does.

I’m angry because I let this lady get the best of me. She carried me soooo hard. For no reason. It’s going to fuck with my self-esteem all day. I promise.

She better not slip up before I leave. Because that killer come back I have is still locked and loaded.

textmessageless,

KD